i’m bleeding a vermilion smoke of memories
of when I believed love meant forever,
a promise made by damp kisses
and long hugs, broken when you twirled me
under the light of a dingy street lamp and let me
fade off its edges.
desolation reminds you of the letters i wrote you
inked with the tattered hope of your return
that i fought so hard to keep. scrambling
for an unconditional love, you grab a dusty
flashlight nestled in your drawer and shine
its light where you last saw me.
i’m hiding behind the street lamp whose
bulb died years ago.
silent spells 
I love this. The last line is heartbreaking. Also, really brings everything together at the end in such a surreal yet very real way.
I believe this can be read different ways by who is reading it, which I have said is what I love about poetry.
I see the older woman/girl looking for herself, desperate to remember the feeling of unconditional love and finding the little girl behind the street lamp in a smoke of memories.
But I just love this. Very haunting and very true at the same time.
x -CC
Thank you so much. Your comment means a great deal to me. Your interpretation of it is really interesting–when I was writing it, it felt kind of surreal, too.
I almost hesitated to give what I felt reading it, because I knew I was reading it for myself.
But it is hauntingly surreal and beautiful just in itself. I read it several times. Ethereal in many ways, even with the subject matter. Just really loved it. xx
I understand, but I love reading what people are thinking when they read one of my writings. I learn so much from what people are taking from it. Aww, thank you! Your thoughts made my night. You are too kind.
This equals my relationship with my dad. But beautiful as usual.
He’s missing out on a beautiful person & Thank you Nadia.
Awww 🙂 Thanks for that.
It was so soulful Julie. Reading between the lines, one could find so much written. “I am hiding behind the street lamp, whose bulb died years ago” – from what I infer, the light of the relationship is long gone and no matter how much one tries by his small gestures or flashlight to kick out the darkness, some voids are never filled.
Simply loved the beautifully written poignant words 🙂
I really appreciate your comments, Prateek. This piece means a lot to me and I’m glad you were able to feel my sentiments. 🙂
I am honored to be able to do so. 🙂
you’re so incredible. i love you ❤
Aww thank you, i love you too ❤
So lovely 🙂
thank you caroline 🙂
Julia – this is my favorite one. I absolutely love the inclusion of lights. I think it speaks a lot to my current state. Thank you for letting me read dude.
Thank you for reading! It really means a lot to me. I thought you were never going to, haha.